Killer Cabbages

As a note, I got to watch Jakers today. It is the best cartoon on PSB…ever. It even has the vocal stylings of the great Mel Brooks for the sheep. However, it is weird that the makers of the show share my paranoia of cabbages.

My hatred of decorative cabbages began on one crisp fall day in Wheaton, Illinois when I found that some maniacal gardener had decided that a decorative cabbage was a viable option for a sturdy fall plant. He planted it in the already wood-chipped plot infront of my apartment that I normally walked through to cut 2 seconds off of my trip to my class, Archaeology of Lifeways in Ancient Israel. That blasted cabbage with purple twinged green leaves stood in my way! Double blast!@ But one day (even after that stupid cabage survived a couple freezes!) some lovely, absent-minded member of the grounds crew ran over the cabage with a lawnmower throwing the almost edible purple-twinged leaves about the lawn. Hooray the cabage was ended, but the paranoia had begun.

Foward Christmas 2005… one slightly-evil, little sister of mine, gave me an adopted cabage from the supposed Save the Cabages foundations. Are they truly a non-profit organization? I did not see them on any watchdog sites, but I cannot find out anything about this supposed organization. Also, decorative cabages are beginning to cover more places. Just today, I saw decorative cabages around a sign saying, “You are now entering the City of Hamilton.”

Return to Jakers, the entire episode was about Piggly dreaming about alien cabbages taking over their little village. Even his friends turned into cabbages. I am not the only one scared of cabbages! So why are cabbages so terrifying? It goes back to my childhood. For many children born in the late 1970s and early 80s, they were quickly introduced to the fad of cabbage patch babies. While the dolls were cute, the idea behind the dolls was disturbing. Did babies really come from cabbage fields? If not, what were these strange beings born from cabbages and who tended them? Could these cabbage children be used for harm. Fast foward to the 1990s, when Tiny Tunes unmasked the hidden fears of generation. In one episode that spoofed the movie Rear Window, the bunnies were watching Elmer Fud do his nasty work across the street. While the bunnies’ initial fears were unwarranted, the final scene is Elmer tending a very ugly, very scary, sinister cabbage child. Is this the true outcome of a generation of cabbage fears? Is it a conspiracy? Is it just a Fraudian aversion to sauerkraut? Only the cabbages can tell. All I know is this… If the first lifeform detected on Mars is the cabbage, I’m investing in WMDs.

Weirdness

I hate it, and I love it. I love people who are weird and not afraid to show it. I like originality and unexpected. I like the strange and unusual. But akwardness, please, stop the akwardness. I hate it when there is dead time between two people trying to get to know each other. I hate saying the wrong thing and having to back-track while only making things worse. It’s problematic, and I need to make peace with it.

Snow Devils and Valentines Day

Happy Valentines Day…especially to those who had the joy (?!) of seeing it come in at midnight. It is currently 1:30 in the morning, and I’ve been off work for a whole hour and a half. After I go to bed in a few minutes, I will ignore the other 22 1/2 hours of valentines almost completely. I’m not ignoring Valentines on purpose. Tomorrow, I will awake to an empty apartment, and then I will go to Curves (yes, I might wear something red in order to get a free raffle ticket but that doesn’t count), and then I will eat lunch, and then I will leave early to go to work because the roads will probably absolutely aweful, and I can get overtime pay.

Now don’t think that I’m feeling sorry for myself. In fact, I might have celebrated a little too much tonight. When I arrived home, my roomate had left me a nice red, heart shaped box of chocolates that said, “You’re Awesome.” WooHoo! Chocolates! I just had a nerve wrecking, hour drive home in snow/ice with no traction. (This whole email was supposed to be about the snow devil I drove by. It was so cool. I’ve seen many a dust devil, but snow devils are really pretty.) So I arrived home safe and sound, I did not even get my car stuck in my parking lot, and believe me I tried. You should see the tread marks in my parking space. First, I couldn’t park far enough into the space, and then I could not get out of the space. Now, my car is happily parked on the other side of the parking lot. Needless, to say the box of chocolates was welcome. Luckily, it had only 6 pieces in it, or I would have a stomach ache right now. Oh the divinity of having a good piece of chocolate with a glass of milk!

So Happy Valentines. May you see a snow devil, and may you get just the right amount of chocolate! Love to all!

Hello, My Public

Perhaps, a little extravagant for an opening, but a blog is a very weird thing. Anyone can read it if they can find it, and if they want to. But millions of people have a blog or two which they may or may not choose to actually write on. Then the chance of finding a blog on which there is something more interesting on it then a laundry list of emo life events or lunch options.

No offense… It’s not as though mine will be any better. Actually, it is probably low self esteem that causes me to lash out at the mundaneness of other’s work. In fact, what is mundane to one is the source of life to another. Kinda like, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Now, many of my friends use their blogs for the excellent purpose of exposing their religious walk and to open their lives in a way that can build community and draw in seekers into a community of believers. This is highly commendable. I started a blog with the same basic idea in October when I was attending More Excellent Way with Kara. My first post was a bitter, slightly critical, somewhat hopeful, heart-bleeding, life-historical post. I hated it. Too much self exposure for a first blog. I’ve tried to go back to that blog, or even erase my first post and start over, but I cannot go back. Perhaps, I’ll share that blog at sometime in the future, but for now, I’m going to keep it fairly light. Although, I am in a cynical stage. 5 years of higher academia will do that to a girl.

There were other things I was going to write about tonight, but I went in a totally different dirrections. It is possible to be several places at once. So here is my first blog. Pray for something substancial and interesting in the future.